I have always wanted to tell you this, but I’ve never had the heart to confess. I couldn’t face the disappointment that would come with this admission and I’d hate feeling like I failed you. There is something I must tell you, however, if for no other reason than to get it off of my chest and clear my conscience.
The Christmas tree didn’t just fall over by itself, as I told you it did. My younger brother knocked it over. Unfortunately, even though he knocked it over, I must take full responsibility for it. You see, he knocked it over because while we were wrestling I threw him into the tree.
I have a sneaking suspicion that you’ve always known this and have just let me think that I got away with something, but I could live with the guilt no longer. The aftermath of the catastrophe I caused was truly traumatic. Tinsel was everywhere. Ornament hooks lay across the living room like dead jelly fish washed upon the shore after the tide. Broken bits of colored balls were scattered across the carpet as if each one had violently exploded. And you merely shook your head in acknowledgement when I told you that it just fell over by itself.
I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me. Both for lying and for throwing your son into a tree. I’ve lived with the guilt and the shame for far too long and I can not deal with it any longer.
I love you always and forever,