Dearest reader, I have acquired many new followers recently, and not all of you are familiar with my certain brand of sickness. Therefore, I’d like to kindly advise you NOT to read any further if you are easily offended.
Yes, DP, I have a favorite quote that I return to time and time again. My favorite quote is deep. It’s madly philosophical. It’s a thinking man’s quote. It’s a quote which sparks tireless debate everywhere it is uttered. And similar to “What came first, the chicken or the egg?” there’s really no clearcut answer.
My quote was coined by Windsor Horne Lockwood III, a hideously hilarious character from the Myron Bolitar series by Harlan Coben. The quote is:
If you clone yourself and then have sex with your self, is it considered incest or masturbation?
As you can reasonably deduce, plausible arguments can be made for both sides of the, erm, argument.
Is it incest? Well, technically you are related to yourself. You share the same genes as yourself. You have the same parents as yourself. There’s not necessarily a proper term to describe the relationship you have with yourself, but you most certainly came swimming from the same gene pool. So technically, if you have sex with yourself it could, and should, be considered incest.
Is it masturbation? Well, you are fucking yourself and isn’t that the very definition of masturbation?
Ultimately, I have decided that the answer is both. It’s both incest and masturbation because both terms apply. But I love this quote because of the debate that ensues after it’s spoken and the hilarity of said debates.
And, because it’s Friday Foolishness day over at Guapola, I’ll even let a poll decide the answer.
And now, it’s time for that very debate. What say you, dear reader? Incest or masturbation?