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blog, blogging, Crime, Harlan Coben, Humor, humour, Incest, INSPIRATION, Masturbation, Myron Bolitar, Opinion, POST IDEAS, postaday, quotes, Sexuality, Stupidity, WRITING PROMPTS
Dearest reader, I have acquired many new followers recently, and not all of you are familiar with my certain brand of sickness. Therefore, I’d like to kindly advise you NOT to read any further if you are easily offended.
Yes, DP, I have a favorite quote that I return to time and time again. My favorite quote is deep. It’s madly philosophical. It’s a thinking man’s quote. It’s a quote which sparks tireless debate everywhere it is uttered. And similar to “What came first, the chicken or the egg?” there’s really no clearcut answer.
Well, I was wrong. Evidently the egg came first.
My quote was coined by Windsor Horne Lockwood III, a hideously hilarious character from the Myron Bolitar series by Harlan Coben. The quote is:
If you clone yourself and then have sex with your self, is it considered incest or masturbation?
As you can reasonably deduce, plausible arguments can be made for both sides of the, erm, argument.
Is it incest? Well, technically you are related to yourself. You share the same genes as yourself. You have the same parents as yourself. There’s not necessarily a proper term to describe the relationship you have with yourself, but you most certainly came swimming from the same gene pool. So technically, if you have sex with yourself it could, and should, be considered incest.
Is it masturbation? Well, you are fucking yourself and isn’t that the very definition of masturbation?
Ultimately, I have decided that the answer is both. It’s both incest and masturbation because both terms apply. But I love this quote because of the debate that ensues after it’s spoken and the hilarity of said debates.
And, because it’s Friday Foolishness day over at Guapola, I’ll even let a poll decide the answer.
And now, it’s time for that very debate. What say you, dear reader? Incest or masturbation?
And finally, check out these other great Daily Prompt posts:
I concur that the best answer is both.
Like a doctor?
Just like a doctor.
Bravo.
It’s homosexual masturcest.
Holy fuck balls! I never thought of that!
Well, you don’t have my brain, now do you?
Well, not quite. Like I said in the post, I have my own brand of sickness. It’s dark, twisted, and funny. In a dark and twisted way.
Mine is twisty and sickly ~
Ooooooohhhh… Me likey.
Teacher, Teacher, I’m oh so clever (that’s me…)
Ha ha! I was that way depending on my mood. Other times I’d sit there and think, “Really? No one else knows the effing answer?”
I liked to talk…and to challenge everything…
Oh, I like to challenge everything, if for no other reason than to be a pain in the ass.
I dreaded having a student like me in any class I taught…although I love school and learning and lectures and talking and such…
Yeah, I have found out through my children that having children like me isn’t a pleasant experience. Luckily I can still kick their asses.
My kid talks 10x more than me… I got my comuppance too ~
WHOO HOO for ass kicking!
It always saves the day.
“We all pay for life with death, so everything in between should be free.” Bill Hicks.
That’s one of my favorites. Pretty clear and concise.
I’m not sure how many people would agree with that.
Aside from picking the obvious choice (Seriously, what the hell is wrong with you?), I’d submit that if you have time to ask, you’re doing it wrong.
Thanks for the pingback! Oh, and the egg came first.
Glad to clear that up for ya!
Idk, the doctors haven’t been able to isolate the problem.
You are certainly welcome for the pingback. Everyone should be able to enjoy your Friday Foolishness.
I concur that you have something seriously wrong with you. Like a doctor. (Do you see what I did there?) Also, that if you had a clone of yourself, it would make more sense to send it out for pizza or something. As fabulous as I am, i don’t think I’d have sex with me. For one thing, I’m not gay (not that there is anything wrong with being gay). Didn’t think of that, did you? It can be gay masturbating incest.
I have thought too long about this.
Well, if you’re too lazy to go out for pizza then you’re clone will be, too. Didn’t think of THAT, did you? Bazinga!
PS. You can never think too long about this. It is an epic question to ponder.
Incest no, doesn’t bear thinking about. But masturbation, sure, I’ll go with that option, no problems.
Thanks for the pingback by the way, damn nice of ya.
No problem.
I really don’t know what to say… But this post rocked!
No opinion! C’Mon, Hook! What kind of blogger doesn’t offer an opinion?
A sad, sad one….
I find your lack of opinion disturbing.
I’m not sure what goes on in that head of yours to even come up with this question, but I’ll perform my civic blogger duty and respond with…masturbation. As the mother of a teenage boy I hope to god he never clones himself. I’m already going through wholesale sized bottles of conditioner and industrial sized bundles of paper towels as it is..I couldn’t afford 2!
I’m pretty sure it results from a lack of oxygen from the damn mask. Darth Vader would have acted way more like Tinkerbell without his.
LMAO! I have no witty retort for that one. Well played, Elyse.
Remember. I am INVINCIBLE.
Oh, I don’t know about that.
Just get used to it, TD. You are out matched. And I can breathe.
Oh, I am never outmatched. You just caught me in an off-moment.
Ugh, tell me about it.
You didn’t include my choice in your poll: Oy Vey.
And I am sooooo glad I didn’t open this one at work!
Oh, I didn’t think to add a NSFW disclaimer. I probably should have…
Masturbation definitely. You are basically playing with yourself…and seriously wtf is wrong with you.
. Hilarious.
Hey, I didn’t come up with this question! But it IS fun to ponder, is it not?
Yep. Which came first…
The egg. Didn’t you see the picture?
Yep. But even he is saying I think I did. If he can’t or doesn’t know for sure, how can we?
I took it as him being sure and either being sarcastic or ashamed…. he was probably premature.
After looking at again, I have to say I concur with you…just like a doctor.
Well done.
You are witty as ever. Thanks for the pingback.
Why thank you!
I concur (like a doctor) that it’s both.
But I have a few questions. On one hand, you are the one person in the world that knows what you like. On the other hand, what if you realize that you are not as good in bed as you thought? And does this make you bisexual?
Your self esteem. What does this do to your self esteem? Are you more empowered? Or do you hate yourself because YOU are the only person who is willing to sleep with you.
I think too much. And everyone thinks that there is something wrong with you
On the other hand, what if you realize that you are not as good in bed as you thought?
Then no one else will know plus you have the added advantage of practicing to get better without anyone knowing that you’re practicing to get better.
And does this make you bisexual?
That depends. If you masturbate does that make you bisexual? (I think this is another blog topic). I guess, technically it would since you’re having sex with someone of the same sex.
Your self esteem. What does this do to your self esteem? Are you more empowered? Or do you hate yourself because YOU are the only person who is willing to sleep with you.
Just because you’re banging you’re clone doesn’t mean no one else will sleep with you. Well, it probably does but it doesn’t preclude the possibility of sex with some one else. As for self esteem, I guess your performance would be what affects that. If you’re good you’re going to feel good. If you suck (not in THAT way) then you’ll feel bad about yourself.
See Twindaddy, this is why I think you are brilliant!
Woohoo!!
Oh gosh, I just realized that you might have taken my first comment to mean that I was angry or offended by your quote. It isn’t like that. I am sorry if that’s what it sounded like.
Uh, not at all.
I think you just catapulted yourself to the top of my favorite bloggers to read list (in my head). Congrats. Laughed the whole way through this post
Thank you, thank you. I can have that affect on people.
Noticed, I have
Played, well, you have.
Now I’m just freaking confused. Threw a wrench into the whole system!! My tiny knowledge of YodaSpeak cannot handle all the commas and separations!
Oops…there wasn’t supposed to be a comma between played and well. Grammatical error, I made.
Mastered the master, have I?
It appears so. Very good, my young Padawan. Well done.
YAY!