….I was a winner in the Jen and Tonic 12 Days of Christmas extravaganza. I was truly excited. The last time I had won anything so awesomely spectacular was when I won a Taco Bell pin for buying a 49-cent taco.
I’ve been looking forward to my prize for several weeks, but due to errors by our horribly inept postal system, I just received the prize a couple of days ago.
Thank you, Jen, for all of your hard work getting the prize to me even though the USPS sucks ass and sent my prize back to you. It truly is one of the most proudest moments in my life, second only to the 20-second long fart I let loose when I was 12.
Oh, and I can’t really stand Nicholas Cage, but I will treasure this gift always because it’s from you.