I don’t normally delve into the realm of “what-ifs” because it seems pointless to dwell on things that could have been instead of things that are. There’s literally an entire multiverse of “what-ifs” out there for one to get lost in, but if you’re lost in it you aren’t concentrating on where you actually are. And that, dearest reader, is how you run into that telephone pole you didn’t see while you were texting and walking. Or something.
However, today’s prompt is somewhat imaginative and on the off-chance that I win the lottery I suppose I should have some sort of plan for what to do with a hypothetical plot of land that some weirdo might hypothetically give me. So come get lost with me in hypothetics, won’t you? Oh, and don’t touch anything. These are my hypothetics. Get your own.
You’re given a plot of land and have the financial resources to do what you please. What’s the plan?
Since we’re dealing strictly with hypotheticals, this plot of land will be flat. I hate parking on a steeply inclined driveway or having to mow grass on a hill. It blows and I won’t do it in my hypothetical world. And you can’t play on it. So there.
Oh, and this plot will be located in Alaska. I’ve always wanted to live in Alaska for the beautiful scenery and because I can’t stand hot weather.
The first part of the plan is to build a house. It will be a ranch with four bedrooms. One for me, and one for each of my children. They need their own rooms, especially the twins. They are getting older and need their own space to do, you know, teenage boy stuph™.
Something like this. (Photo credit: charchen)
The house will have a living room and a man cave. The living room will obviously be for family stuph™, such as games, movie nights, and holiday get-togethers. The man cave will be just that, and located in a finished basement. Duh. This will be where my geekery will be on full display. All of my Star Wars paraphernalia. My Bengals paraphernalia. My Michigan paraphernalia. And any other such collectables I may obtain since I’ve been hypothetically endowed with ample financial resources.
The kitchen will be adequately sized and contain top-of-the-line appliances. I’m not much into cooking, but when I have to do it I want to be able to do it in style. And convenience.
The house would also have a three-car garage. It would house two cars and the additional space would be used for tools and storage. The driveway would have a basketball goal and would be wide enough to actually play basketball. The twins and I love playing, and I’m sure Baby C will too once he’s old enough to play.
Swimming pool in large garden (Photo credits: Hot Tub Barn)
Outside I would build an in-ground swimming pool. I was lucky enough to have one of these for a couple of years growing up and it was insurance that if there was nothing else to do, we could always go swimming. It’s endless hours of fun for the entire family in addition to being great exercise.
There would also be an outdoor hot tub. There is nothing greater than chilling (metaphorically speaking) in a hot tub at the end of a tough, gruelling day with an alcoholic beverage in one hand and nothing in the other.
Doesn’t that look like so much fun?
The entire yard would be fenced in so that my puppy could have the run of the place without having to be on a leash. When we first got her we had this luxury, but the last few places we have not and I feel bad for her that she can’t leave the house without being tied to a leash.
This is my wonderful dog, She has her moments, but I love her and couldn’t imagine life without her.
Also, since I have I’ll have the financial resources to do whatever I want, I’ll be hiring someone to care for the lawn and to keep the landscape nice and purdy. I loathe yard work but love a fresh, clean-looking property. Ironic, I know, but that’s how I roll. I’m all kinds of weird. Deal with it.
It’s that special time, dearest reader, where I turn the tables and ask you that which I have already answered. What would you do with all this hypothetical charity?
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Sounds beyond perfect! I always wondered what was in a man cave
Every thing that particular man likes that perhaps no one else does.
All of the colleges in Oxford University have beautiful lawns in their courtyards and no one is allowed to walk on them. They have special guards called Bulldogs to keep people off the grass. It’s hysterical. You could probably hire one for your yard.
Well then the kids couldn’t play in it! That’s the whole point in having a flat, fenced-in yard.
Oh, ok, so the “you can’t play on it” was for non-family. My bad.
Duh.
I seem to have lost my critical-reading skills.
Is that all?
No. My whole damn brain seems to be missing. If I weren’t so stubborn, and, you know, wanting to live a long healthy life, I’d get my brain back with a pack of cigarettes.
Noooooooooooooooo!!!!
It’s been 2.5 weeks. There’s no point in turning back now.
Good. I’m too broke to drive down there and kick your ass. In a good, motivational way I mean.
If I get to the point that I need an good old fashioned, motivational kick in the ass, I’ll meet you half way, and, at least, buy you lunch, and probably the gas too since that would still be 400 miles of driving.
Oh, I know. I’ve made that trek countless times. It’s been over 20 years, though.
I plan to win the lottery tonight so I will be writing my what IS tomorrow. Love your cutie of a dog.
Oh, cool. If you have any left over you know how to reach me…
There’s a line. But I will make out a nice fat check to TwinDaddy
I’m sure any bank will take it.
Sweet. As long as they cash it I don’t care if it’s rubber or not.
Sounds like an amazing dwelling but I have one concern, how many months swim time do you get with an outdoor pool in Alaska? I have never been to Alaska so i guess I may be exaggerating the cold in my mind.
In the southern part of the state you have summer just like in Canada. Hell they have Alaskan cruises.
What about a guest house?? Where are all your blogging friends supposed to stay when they come to visit, huh??
Hmm…I didn’t know that anyone would be visiting. I shall ponder this. Okay, I’m done.
Lmao…..guess my telescope will really come in handy now!!
Yup.
I dunno… I’d let you run wild in my forest and muck it up in my river, but you won’t even let me on your lawn? It’s not like you have to care for it, you’ve got people for that… Would the in ground pool be in a building so it could still be enjoyed in the winter (in Alaska)?
Hmmm…that’s not a bad idea for the pool…
Always happy to help.
Or I could make it a heated pool so that I could still see the scenery.
Good call…. Been in a couple heated pools in Mammoth and June Lake (nothing like it after a long day on the slopes), and they all had floor to ceiling windows on at least one wall so that you could look out and enjoy the natural beauty around you.
Nature is a beautiful sight to behold if unmolested by man.
Agreed. Whole heartedly.
Boy, I sure hope you can still access the Internet from your secluded hypothetical Alaskan home! But really it does sound nice!
Well of course!!!! How would I blog otherwise?
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Nice hypotheticals. I wouldn’t change much. Id stay in my apartment and ask for upgrades. I probably wouldn’t even quit job. Of course family would be taken care of for life. Donations for neutropenia and mental illness in hopes of a cure…eh this is all hypothetical anyway.
BTW. My niece tripped over her feet while texting. Her nickname is now Sasquatch.
Lol.
Yeah….
Oh man, I’ve always wanted to live in Alaska too. On flat land. Cause yeah, mowing hills sucks. And live in a ranch. A big one, that sprawls out. Good post.
Unshitty™ even.
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Well, since you ask… Technically, OHP already have the land, we just lack the financial resources to get the new Priory built! Work has been started because of the planning permission regulations here in the UK, but if I had the resources, I’d get our Priory built. The current one is a lovely building, but it’s a large building made completely of extensions and when it’s cold or raining heavily, it shows. (Most of the current Priory was built before central heating, so systems were put in afterwards and there are a number of places where there still is no heating at all, and there are several different heating systems so the temperature fluctuates as you walk around the place and move from sectino to section. And when it rains heavily, the joins in the roof/roofs leak.)
Forgive my ignorance, but what’s a priory?
It’s another name for a monastery or convent or abbey. Ours is called a Priory because the head of the Order is called the Prioress. If she were an Abbess, we’d be in an Abbey. If she was simply called Mother, then we’d probably be in a Convent (as for some reason, Monasteries are for men and Convents are for women).
Oh, okay.